tired of the raw today.

-1 1/2 filter bars
-coconut/pineapple/banana/ginger smoothie
-couple of date-coconut things
-3/4 c zuchini hummus, 1 carrot
-handful of almonds
-handful of cashews
-8 oz. apple juice

i found myself getting a little tired of raw food so i made some zucchini hummus to renew my interest in eating. for the most part, it worked. it also gave me terrible breath (raw garlic). if anyone wants to eat anywhere that raw food is served (karyn's, chicago diner, cousin's,etc) or is interested in some mean raw food prep, please let me know. i could use some variety in my diet about now. still - i was at a social event last night with lots of yummy food (and cake!) and i remained strong. my will cannot be broken.

my cravings aren't too bad actually, but these are things i would like to eat post-raw:
-take-a-hike scone
-cheese
-long coconut bun
-falafel (from sultan's)
-pizza
-indian food
-sushi

also: it's worth noting that i went to the gym tonight, for the first time since my accident. i did ok for someone with only one functional arm. overall, it felt pretty good. i also took the opportunity to weigh in. hard to say how much weight i've lost since my normal range is 117-120, but i would guess it's about 3-4 pounds. i wonder how much of that is poop weight!

current weight: 114.5 lbs

my response to pq.

i have been totally ravenous too! especially for the sweet. i'm back up to my extreme banana consumption of yesteryear. i really think i was meant to be a fruitarian. god - i've also been inhaling those date-coconut things from trader joe's.

i've been hoarding my two filter bars like the peanut butter sandwiches in that episode of punky brewster when they get stuck in that cave and aren't sure if they'll ever see the light of day again. that's exactly how i feel when i walk out of filter - my future becomes totally uncertain.

oh and i made the zucchini hummus today - amazing! 2 zucchini, olive oil, garlic, tahini, sesame seeds, lemon juice, salt, cumin, paprika and cayenne pepper. i was out of tahini and was scared of getting caught in a torrential downpour so i cheated and used some cashews instead. i figured that when they get blended they are a similar consistency as tahini so it was a decent substitution. it worked great. next time i'll use tahini for even better results, but i am really happy with how this turned out.

not sure if i am going to fast/master cleanse -- i am scared of jeopardizing my wrist's recovery because of malnutrition. we'll see.

my partner in gluttony.

another update from pq --

I ate 2 filter bars today. Yes! Fuck they are amazing. I had a funny convo with the girl at the counter. She said I was smart to stock up(I bought 3) 'cause they're such good sellers. Oh yes, they are...Thanks for the tip by the way. I seriously doubt I would have checked there this morning if you hadn't called.

Nothing ever came of those pills. I'm not that interested in taking more right now. I think they smelled funny. Maybe in conjunction with the master cleanse? I'm starting on Thursday!

Raw 8:
-cashew rawvolution bar
-3/4c guac (serious overload)
-4 carrots
-2 dates
-1/2c sprouts
-1 1/2c carrot salad (carrots, ginger, apple, raisins, walnuts, parsley, lemon juice, apple cider vinegar - okay, maybe not raw)
-1/2c water from yet another young coconut
-1c watermelon
-1/2c berries
-1/4c coconut cream (young coconut meat and water, cashews, dates)
-6-grain fake bar

I skipped the morning P/B again because of the pill, but took them in the late afternoon. I did not take them again at night.

Raw 9:
-larabar- a chocolate mint one (raw enough?)
-1c carrot salad
-3 carrots
-2T almond butter
-plum
-1/2 c sprouts
-1c carrot salad
-1/2c guac
-1/4 c coconut cream
-1/2c mixed berries
-3 dates

I'm ravenous. I've been feeling constantly hungry. Perhaps this has something to do with the break from psyllium. Speaking of which, on the morning of day 9 I broke into my second batch of psyllium. I think I must have had the powder at first, and now the husk. Whatever I have now is definitely not nearly torturous enough. I also think the powder yields better results.

i am a ravenous pig.

but it would be better if i was a ravenous pug, which is what i accidentally typed the first time.

today i consumed:
-green shake
-the other half of that stuffed tomato; spinach salad
-banana with almond butter
-a bunch of pineapple
-3 or 4 coconut date rolls (which i am addicted to)
-pineapple/banana/coconut/ginger smoothie (YUM)
-1/2 FILTER BAR! (aka the holy grail)
-2 dried peaches from tj's

banana count: at least 3, possibly more!

apparently, not only was i ravenous, but i seem to have returned to my natural state of fruitarian. i guess this should not have come as a shock to me given my experience last time and my unending love of sugar.

note: the filter bar is back! i bought a couple, but i already wish i had more. i think of gg, whose grandparents were of the depression generation and hoarded thousands of dollars in small change throughout their house up until their deaths. if raw had the shelf life for it, i would follow the very same strategy. when i asked the filter employees about this bar, they were elusive as ever telling me that they had "no idea" what is in it or where it comes from. even the person who allegedly does the ordering told me that the bars are excellent sellers but mysteriously could not tell me where they come from. i'm placated for now, but i'm still gonna need some answers! if any one has any information about these bars, please contact me.

also, i'm following pq's lead and laying off the psyllium for a few days. i'm bloated and its gross.

jesus christ.

i LOVE raw almond butter.i cannot stress this enough.

almond butter is best:
1-slathered all over a banana, my other favorite food of all time
2-straight from the jar - no dilution of flavor and full enjoyment of texture

go out and buy some now. it will change your life.

1 week down: an update from pq.

As I mentioned, the last two days have been pretty good. While the bloating/fullness rage on, I'm apparently done with the headaches. I still have little interest in cooked food, but as you'll see below, I've really developed quite the appetite for rawness.

Day 6:
-6-grain wannabe bar
-1/2c coconut
-2 celery stalks
-1T almond butter
-mango, banana, etc smoothie (from Cheetah)
-1/2 avocado
-1/4c pico de gallo (questionably old, but still tasty)
-1 dolma
-1 pizza square
-1 cinnamon girl
-1/2 piece of Karyn's mint carob cake (this was pretty old too, good thing raw lasts forever...)

Day 7:
-1/2c coconut
-spirulina/cashew rawvolution bar
-1 dolma
-1 pizza square
-1/2c guacamole
-3 carrots
-2 celery stalks
-2 cinnamon girls

I laid off the evening dose of psyllium, bentonite and fenugreek on
day seven since we took the herbal explosion pills. Still nothing
exciting by the way. I did some totally rawsome food prep today, so I
should be eating well the next few days. I'm totally over eating out
for a while, but we should still plan to do Sultan's at some point,
and I want to try the other raw plate at Karyn's cooked. I also want
that hemp ice cream! I love raw.

kind of scat heavy.

woke up with a feeling of tightness/fullness/weirdness in my belly. is it just the psyllium or is that other stuff at work? my first elimination of the day (930am) was definitely significant, but that's par for the course when you're only eating rabbit food. went again around 11, but it was minor to average. went again around 2 or 3 but it barely counted. so, no significant effects from the poo pill i took. i feel cheated.

i pigged out today:
-green shake (9am)
-spinach salad with beets, carrots, tomatoes, peppers; 1/2 tomato stuffed with avocado, sprouts, pecans, pine nuts and celery (11:30)
-banana with almond butter (2pm)
-1/2c. raw slaw (4pm)
- slice of pineapple, 1/2 kiwi (6pm)
-smoothie with mango, pineapple and banana, alliance raw bar (8pm)

pysllium: a gateway supplement

so, pq pointed out that while doing a cleanse, one is not supposed to graze. instead, the idea is to eat "well-spaced" meals to give your digestive system a break and free your body up to take care of other things. i guess your insides are doing over-time if you constantly snack the way i usually do. anyway, i did try this today and i didn't die of starvation. in fact, i think i did alright.

here's what i ate, by meal:
-green shake (9am)
-2 c. raw slaw; 7 almonds (noon)
-1c, raw slaw (3pm)
-tomato stuffed with avocado, sprouts, pecans, celery, pine nuts; spinach salad with beets, carrots and tomatoes (630)
-alliance bar (note: not to be confused with a filter bar. we'll get into this more later) (830)

big news: i finally had my first psyllium poop today!

bigger news: pq and i took something "a little harder" today, courtesy of l. it's some kind of herbal laxative that even our seasoned vet can't handle. how will we fare? give us 8-12 hours and we'll let you know. we synchronized our pill popping (which tasted like gross pizza going down) so it will be interesting to see who will have something to report first. anyone want to start a pool?

someone who loves the green kool-aid even more than i do!

i know you've heard about pq, but consider this your official introduction. she has been an enthusiast of this cleanse and a partner as life-giving and refreshing as the young coconut of which she speaks. pq loves psyllium, cats and high elevations. in the interest of getting everyone up to speed, i am going to post the fallout of her first few days of raw:

day 1:
-Filter raw bar - a date and cherry one maybe. It wasn't the usual raw one.
-banana
-2 celery stalks with almond butter
-larabar - a banana one
-a few bites of a failed parsnip and pine nut whip - it was just sort of gross.
-1/2 avocado
-1/2 c. pico de gallo
-1/4 c. cashew sour cream
-3 cinnamon girls

I think I need to eat more produce and less bars. I have a bar addiction. [oh pq - don't we all. -m.]

day 3:
I actually had more energy than during previous days and was in a pretty good mood. Also, as you know, I was out until 2:00 without a single drink, which is a small miracle in itself. Here's what I knocked back instead:

-1/2 cup of mixed berries - raspberries, blackberries, and blueberries.
-chocolate larabar
-1/2 apple
-2 T almond butter
-handful of cashews
-Karyn's raw plate (cabbage, broccoli, nori rolls, nut pate, seed hummus, avocado)
-cranberry juice with lime (not raw, but purposeful)

day 4:
-1c watermelon (yum!)
-handful of cashews
-1/2c mixed berries
-1/2 carob mint cake from karyn's
-1/2 avocado
-1/2c pico de gallo
-1/2c sprouts
-2T cashew sour cream
-water of a young coconut! (Yes, I got a whole coconut and drank its life giving juice!)
-1/2c coconut

Up until yesterday I would have said that I was feeling noticeably better in the tummy region- no bloating, no aching, etc. Yesterday however, I felt really uncomfortable. I was also totally exhausted all day and had the most wicked of headaches. I never get headaches. I'm not really experiencing food craving at all. In fact, most food sounds kind of gross, and I had to really force myself to eat yesterday, even the cake. My sense of smell also seems to be heightened. All else is
well.

day 5:
First things first. As you know, yesterday I still had a terrible headache and felt once again really uncomfortable in the belly. The feeling is like a cross between bloated and full, but I'm not really either. Also, I'm smelling really herbal, but I think my skin is looking good. Here was yesterday's line up:

-ginger larabar
-1/2c mixed berries
-2 handfuls spinach
-1/2c sprouts
-almost a whole avocado
-12 grapes
-1/4c coconut
-Cousins dinner (3 flax crackers, 2 dolma, 1/4c sprouts, a tomato slice, 2 pizza squares, 1/3 carrot cheesecake, clove tea)
-cranberry juice (still not raw, dammit!)

shout outs.

i'd like to take a moment to give a shout out to the rest of my raw army - you may or may not see posts from any number of them in the future...

g. -- you all know about her blinding tanlines and giant quads from the last episode. she's my original raw partner in crime! g. - are you out there?

PQ -- short for psyllium queen. she's blogshy but is dedicated enough to send me detailed accounts of her raw experience. i can no longer keep this treasure all to myself, so i'm going to start posting her updates for her!

l. -- a true believer and veteran cleanser. i would kill to see the inside of her colon. not sure if she has the will to blog, but if she does it will be a treat far sweeter than even a chocolate coconut chew larabar.

gg. -- a raw newbie. a commendable effort, minus all that pbr...

temptation strikes.

as i mentioned, i really haven't been craving cooked food this time around. until tonight. i went to a potluck for a friend's birthday. social situations are probably the hardest part of this cleanse, but i was prepared. i made a huge tray of raw slaw and gg. made some zucchini pasta. as it turned out there was even some raw-approved jerusalem salad. i was in great shape at what could have been a potentially disastrous event. and then there was dessert. fig newtons, chocolate chip cookies and the motherload: tiny, beautiful, chocolate cupcakes. i nearly lost all will to the sweets, but i managed to stay strong. i immediately picked up the phone to try to get a filter bar fix, but their supply was still out. instead i got through it with the help of that chocolate larabar. it was a very close call.
in sum:
-green shake
-cousin's leftovers: 2 pistachio falafel, 2 flax pizza, 1 flax cracker, 2 pieces of lettuce, 2 slices of tomato
-apple, 7 almonds, handful of raisins
-raw slaw (cabbage, carrots, beets, apple, raisins, applejuice, cider vinegar)
-1/2c. zucchini pasta with tahini-sun-dried tomato sauce
-couple spoonfuls of jerusalem salad
-chocolate coconut chew larabar
also: kamut, fenugreek, psyllium/bentonite

still feel good though definitely bloated. could be pms, but i'm pretty sure it's the psyllium.

raw people love to talk about their shit!

feeling good. not craving cooked food at all and feeling pretty energetic. all in all, this cleanse seems much easier to me now that i've already been around the raw block. actually, after the master cleanse, this raw thing feels downright luxurious.
my consumption:
-green shake
-handful of grapes
-half bell pepper
-15 almonds
-apple - probably the best pink lady i have ever eaten!
-cousin's dinner - 2 dolma, 2 pieces of flax pizza, 2 pistachio falafel (amazing!), copious amounts of flax crackers, 1/3 piece raw carrot cheesecake with raw chocolate sauce - i want to bathe in this stuff it's so good!
- and of course taking psyllium/bentonite, kamut and fenugreek...

i was also lucky enough to go on a raw outing with pq, l. and some non-raw supporters. it was delicious. it's funny that what would normally be considered inappropriate dinner conversation dominated the table talk. even the waiter chimed in with a heartfelt discussion of his bowel movements and his cleanse du jour. the dude was ex-military turned flake who couldn't quite manage to keep us supplied with flax crackers (or water). i dare say he wouldn't normally turn too many heads, but pq's ears perked right up as soon as he said the magic word: PSYLLIUM. apparently poo is a very powerful aphrodisiac.

let the detox begin.

so, i started the day with a delicious psyllium/bentonite cocktail. for the newbies out there, psyllium is a fiber that instantly turns into snot upon contact with water. bentonite is clay. yes, clay. for old times sake, i immediately began dry heaving as soon as i felt the thick mass touch my lips. yum. even the smell alone at this point is enough to make me queasy. but still, this stuff makes your shit absolutely amazing. i soldier on. i also began taking some fenugreek - but only about a third of karyn's recommended dosage (2 capsules instead of 6). i've yet to smell of indian food, but give me a couple of days.

it should be noted that i have been to filter 3 times in the past 36 hours trying to score one of their amazing raw peanut butter/flax/sesame/sunflower seed bars. they are amazing, but they don't do me any good when they're sold out and i need a fix. can someone help me out here? i've heard alliance carries them too. in my current semi-crippled state, i'm not too proud to accept donations (of bars).

consumption:
- banana
- kiwi
- zucchini pasta with tahini and sundried tomato sauce
- guacamole with carrots, peppers and jicama
- 3/4 cocoa mole larabar
- green shake - with the addition of frozen mango

i'm quite the heathen.

rawrawraw.

after experiencing the extreme denial of the master cleanse (NO FOOD!), the raw diet seems like such a breeze. i haven't had a hard time at all and i'm not really craving any cooked food. to be fair though - my right wrist is in a cast - i couldn't cook even if i wanted to.

what i ate:
- apple with almond butter
- green shake (old school, original formula style)
- carrots, guacamole
- kiwi
- salad: spinach, carrots, beets, raisins, cucumber, peppers
- handful of almonds
- banana

possibly some other stuff. honestly, this day is a blur and i can't quite remember. also, i'm getting sick. that means headache, congestion, runny nose. i know these are all detox symptoms, but that's not what's going on here after a mere 48 hours. i think i've been through a lot this week and my body's playing catch up. we'll see what happens.

vicodin & enemas?

since i'm taking some serious pharmaceuticals, i've decided to start eating raw food but hold off on the actual detox for now. vicodin and enemas - two things that don't seem to go together. i won't be following karyn to the letter this time, but i'll be generally following along as i did last time. no official weigh in this time, but as a starting point - i weighed 120 lbs (!) at the doctor's office with all of my clothes on, and about the same at the gym, nearly naked. so, somewhere between 117 and 120 lbs.

today:
- banana
- 3 kiwis
- 1 avocado, 3 carrots, 2 stalks of celery
- handful of almonds
- handful of grape tomatoes
- couple of pieces of broccoli
- coconut/cocoa larabar

a new day raw-ing.

for those of you who haven't heard, i had a run-in with a speeding car on tuesday night. i was riding my bike and got hit pretty hard on my right side. to cover the obvious bases: i'm ok; my bike is not. no, i wasn't wearing a helmet; yes i know i'm lucky that i didn't hit my head. yes, the driver stuck around; no, the shithead didn't have any insurance. also: i fractured my wrist and i am now sporting a purple cast in memory of the bike i lost. all in all, i'm okay, but getting hit by a car is definitely a pain in the ass. i don't recommend it.

anyway, despite my injuries, i've decided to forge on with my detox. ideally, i'd like to see if i can stay on raw food as long as i have my cast. current estimate: 3 - 6 weeks.

update.

so, as you may have gathered, the master cleanse didn't go as planned. i lasted about 3 days on the lemonade, but i was not strong enough to battle through cold weather without the comfort of hot food. eventually, my will gave out to the pressures of a friend in town and some vietnamese food. i'm just about ready to get back on the horse though - soon i'll begin a raw-master cleanse hybrid detox. stay tuned for details.